.The Reverse

PMR is coming. But i came back here. I should be in my bed by now. But never mind. Pacak wasn't really available for me to see him lately. Instead, all his corrosive friends are the ones that kept appearing , and i don't want them to. Since yesterday, i have already become somebody. Right. Some sort of President of the Debate Club. > M < . Don had sent me a message just when he left me to continue being the speaker for the day. ==. I had went home at 5.30, not telling anybody what i had just become. MJ's part doesn't seem to be really well. I don;t know whether it's going to go on like this or whatever. I saw him rolling his eyes at me, but i couldn't be sure. Sorry. Stupid Xiu2, Fang2 and Wenzy. How dare your played that stupid thing on me with Zoo Negara. He's a malay ok ,I dodn;t mean to be racist, and he already has somebody, for heaven sake, i don't want him. They had all asked me to show that action to Fang2 so as to let Zo...

25th September 2011 Assembly, Pacak was absent again. Lazy Kid. He gave me one tub of Red Beans Soup, erm, a little over-sweet. (You should have told me that you are bringing me something edible, then i wouldn't have gone to buy that fried rice. XD) My dad prepares it without sugar. ==. I couldn't believe what you rebut when I commented. ≧ω≦. I went to Qiant and watched Nasi Lemak 2.0. Really really FUNNY!! Gosh! Jot : I lost one Friend. Hate It. 26th September 2011 Pacak came to school. He was just beside me during the assembly. He sang the national anthem song by shouting, got tug at his belt by his friends ==, and acted like a guitarists. Funny. Walked pass his class, I was sort of cold in the inside when i saw that he looked so fierce. > _ < I thought back whether i did offend him about anything. Wan Pei said he wouldn't be angry, I wasn't convince, the stupor carried on till school ended. But in the end it was just me being emote. Jot : RM 35 from CRC Wish Me...

Sorry for the slow updates. 19th September 2011 Pengetua left. Pacak was absent. Heard about the "Kiss Me" tale by those teachers. Don gave me a gift. I like it. The gift Wrapper. XD. I wonder how long it took him to do it. WP asked me to investigate about it, but i was unaware of the circumstances that she was hinting. 20th September 2011 I was in the canteen, the middle table. I chose that place so that i could keep a look out for Pacak. He was at the outer stall with his friends. So i just adjusted my head so that i could see him. I think maybe he didn't expect me looking at him like this and he turned his head away sheepishly. I started writing my thoughts in my notebook. Abit sentimental. 21st September 2011 I was late for the assembly. and i missed seeing Pacak. But, i guessed i started to be familiar with another person's time for coming to school. Assembly ended, I accompanied WP for her Che2, and Pacak was there, together with Aizat. I kept looking at him, he...

I found out one thing about myself. I am afraid of Bicycle-Heights. It was evening; mum wanted me to stay away from my books. She asked me to choose between jogging of cycling. Well, I hate running alone, plus I was abit worried if I ran into Pacak what would he say?@@. He won't be somewhere there, just that Maybe. I changed into my attire and went to get the bicycle . When I say the bicycle, it means an old-lady's bicycle. Apparently Nixon was faster than me and took the newer bicycle, plus its seat is too high. > < . So I pushed the bic until the gate and was about to get up when I realize, I couldn't. I tried to lift my hip up but I was scare that I will fall. Nixon was laughing; mum was saying you are unbelievable. So I tried and tried. I lift the paddle with my hands, mum was saying why can't I use my feet to do it. ==, I forgot. After 15 minutes of my trying, I succeeded and I was off with my brother on that old bic. We cycled through the Taman 3 times. I t...

18 days left. No progress. == Went to school. Pacak didn't come. The merdeka thing went well. Stupid event. Saw Don twice, but i don't know what expression he gave me and I don't know how to react, erm, annoyed? He said Monday, hope it;s not something boombastic or what. > < Haha . Jimmy didn't come. So, P was sad. And just because of WP, i had to run to class to call her for her Che2. (WP, say thanks. ) Nixon bought back a Twistie back for me. Just for me. So touched by it. =) He wasn't always that good. XD Love you bro. I went for my BC tuition. Somebody opened the door for me. It was LJC . I was shocked. I asked L. Shian why, it's because he wanted to lock the teacher outside, plus, he doesn't think I would stand any joke of his, he thought i would burst. He actually wanted to ask whoever that wants to come in " Jay Chou or Loh Zhi Xiang ?!" Haha . OF course, LJC you remember what I did right? Bruises? XD By the time the teacher ca...

She said something. I felt nothing. She had instantly become nothing. The End. I didn't take notice of her. Asking somebody to buy books doesn't mean that I asked them to buy just for me to borrow, what I meant was helping me to buy. I know, you weren't in the best mood, you got involve with a small quarrel with Xiu2 that other day just because she didn't give you that sweet. So, I took it, because she gave it to me. I don't think that giving a sweet to somebody who is small-minded is worth it. In the morning, I wasn't in the mood to talk to you. I don't really know why, just claim that I didn't see Pacak. You like to destroy other's people hope, just because you couldn't get that thing doesn't mean I couldn't achieve it myself. From that day you do ask me never to use your sentence form your essay; I swear that I do never touch any of your books, unless I have to. Since our last argument, I had developed the habit of not talking to you ...

1. We were having Geo period. Miss Ng was talking about Ladang Hutan. I wasn't paying attention to the trees in one of the trial papers. So, i asked WH :" Whatare the tress for?" I was thinking that it might be for paper, i only heard a few of what Miss Ng said, WH answered :" For Chopimg of course ! " ==!!! 2. Went for my Maths tuition, the teacher was explaining to one of the student. I heard : " OK, X is the same. Y is the same. So, how to "kill" X, how to kill "Y" ? MINUS LA..." > < !! Not really a joke, just found it funny when i wasn't in a good mood. Thanks WH. :) Jot : Angkor Wat, can you please not be so narcissistic ??? Disgusting.

I was at school form 9 to 5. The Chung Ling debaters came and they won the friendly match. I can accept it, because we really didn't prepare for the best. Will work Harder XD Stupid Angkor Wat, I wish that you weren't there, you just really spoil my mood. Stupid. Don't do it if you don't want to, don't show me that pathetic look. Had lunch together with Don. OK, i surrender, i didn't know there was Nasi Ayam in that row. And after 3 years of being a Badlishan, i had only known it today. @@~. And guess what, I ate a FREE CHICKEN RICE. I forgot to pay when i left. Don didn't even remind me and nobody wasn't there to stop us. But don't worry mak cik , i will pay you tomorrow. XD Didn't have much to write, so just random. Today's thought: You wern't brave enough to pull me. Lol. ;)

LUCKY STAR'S RELATIONSHIP IS FINALLY OPEN..==, SHOCKING. @@! I still cannot accept it lor....XD

To me, it's like the whole thunderstorm just ended. Peace. ^^~ I woke up 15 minutes earlier to check my mailbox. They said they will send me scripts, but guess what, ONLY 8 WORDS. ==. I could have had more sleep. So, i waited for Don after the assembly, walked to Kamar Syura, Ice Beauty was on her way, guessed she could read my mind, she knew that i wanted the key. ;) Went back to class later then, PJ was cancelled, so i did some scanning over the catalogue again..Class carried on, met with the juniors at 11.00. Gosh, so tired, i walked 3 times to the staff room just to get my papers.== During recess, i manage to stand with Pacak with a distance of about half a metre. :) He was at the first sink, and me the second. I really was WASHING MY HAND, but of course, it's nice when he's there. Btw, Fish told me that it was good that i am sensitive to touch.But to me,It was lucky that I wasn't really that sensitive to touch at that time. I was concentrating on talking to the ju...

I slept like dead yesterday. I wasn't having enough sleep as i kept on staying up late. I went in the room and texted Ping and Don, told both of them that i NEED to sleep :D. After about 2 minutes, the phone beep and i replied again and fell asleep without knowing that there was another message. XD I went to school. Fish was finally back. I showed her the Scholastic Catalogue, ans the look on her face. Lol . Just like mine. FOREVER IS ON SALE! YES! She showed me her list of to-buy-list. RM101. @@! I regretted not buying Lament in the last issue. Damn it. I told WP and Fish about my new blog title.:) .The Reverse actually it started when i accidentally hit the fullstop . I was lazy to backspace it. So i just type the next 2 words. I like my blog. Ice-Beauty just questioned us about Edie. She said that she's Emotional. Correct. Unpredictable.Correct. Can shout like a banshee when she's scolding. Correct. Hehe . After English ended, i went to the canteen. My first glance was ...

Been dead tired. I didn't even realize that Pacak came today. Didn't thought about him in the morning like I always did. He was absent for 2 days, fever. I looked straight at his eyes today. Just the same sensation. :D

I wish I could shut myself up right now. I hated almost everything, I hated yesterday, I hated today. I hated almost everyday. I had been stupid, foolish, weak to control my tears. I just let them flow. I can't keep it there, it overflowed. I don't know why should I be like this? Why should I become like this? I do been snapping at my mum, asking her to talk about something else but that . I don't want to know anything about that. I am just annoyed and totally screw up by it. I went into my room and bounced on my bed without switching on the fan. I kept rubbing off my tears, I don't want to see myself like this, breath in and breath out, trying to stabilized my mood, but in the end, it was useless. I just cried and came out after 10 minutes and acting as if nothing happen. Nobody was going to look at my eyes anyway. Right. I am weak. Just annoyed by it.

It is exactly 31 days before my PMR , and see, I am still here, stuck up with the rest of you who are in the Social world, the blogging world and the Facebooking world.Honestly, I should not be here. I should be in my room with my books, but in vain. :( I don't have to MOOD too study. Mood. MOOD means feelings, it controls the colour of my day,my facial expression, my homework, everything, even my sleep. I couldn't sleep yesterday. I was thinking about him again. This morning, I read through my personal diary from 29 th April last year until 2712. They were just words, words that allowed me to visualize my life in 2010. It was funny, that seem to be a real me, a better me, a healthier me. :) I miss it. And now, i do wasted my whole week of holidays watching drama and completing my home works. I finished my past years, and now i am left with revisions for the PMR . I had been stubborn, obstinate to watch that Drama, I was quite determined to be oblivious about the time i...