.The Reverse

I am not in bed yet. Waiting for Green farm to load and harvest my crops. I decided to write, I have a feeling that there's going to be no more stalking. I wasn't in the best mood these days. It's been dead for 3 days now, and no pop-up-s. I tried so hard not to lied to myself, tried to find all kinds of reasons which will help me believe that it's just my own problem. But I don;t know how long will this condition last, even one of my close friend knows i am just ...just too selfless. It was such a sharp question : Am I still having feelings for him? I just answered after 2 minutes, yes. But It doesn't seem right, if you have feelings for a person, you don't have to evaluate so many things to get your answer, it should be spontaneous. I do heard so many things, I don't want to listen, but I'm not deaf. My friend asked if i was in a bad mood due to those things, No, I wasn't, I am just frustrated why I wasn't deaf at that moment. I told my ...

It;s been 5 days since I got my result. Dad had had a dilemma on giving me a notebook. So I didn't say much about it, just annoyed. I went to Penang yesterday, the first stop was at my uncle's house. Stephen had finish his SPM, and now, there were 4 loads of books waiting for me in his study room for me to choose, so I grabbed what i wanted and ended with a basket of books. All of them had congratulated me for my great results. I went to my grandmother-in-law's house. She asked me about my results and kept asking me what did my dad give me. I was abit surprise actually, but i didn't answer her. Then i went in to her room, and she gave me 100 bucks. He told me that my cousin, the one who was born on the same day with me, had get herself a Samsung Galaxy phone about 2000bucks, and a notebook, and she wasn't happy with my grandmother for giving her only 100bucks. Her own relatives gave her 1000bucks. No wonder, and that had answered my questions of why my grandmother w...

总觉得我好像想太多了，我有点贪心。 我想要的却让我开始觉得它不实际。 妈妈今天和我有个关于“谈恋爱”的话题，可我心中的和她想的不同。 妈妈想象中的恋爱和我的不一样，因为我的大有分别，不实际的成分多得很。 是你的关系吗？

By BEST QUOTES I've learned that we don't have to change friends,If we understand that friends change. I've learned that something that you do in an instant, can give you heartache for life . I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words, it may be that last time you see them. I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. I've learned that either you control your attitude, or it controls you . I've learned that my best friend and I , can do anything or nothing and still have a good time. I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you are down, will be the one who helps you get up. I've learned that sometimes when i am angry i have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them too, doesn't mean they don...

I got Another KuKuMeow-Doodle, Coloured. I will use it when I feel it's time for a little colour =) Here is what You asked for :   KUKUMEOW , I LOVE YOU!!  HaHa! XDXD

I got my PMR results. FINALLY!!!!! I had score straight A's, so A notebook in any market is waiting for me, I have to wait. Maybe till Form 5. Maybe Dad will end up saying that IF I score well for SPM then only I will get it. I wonder if he will say that It's going to be really unfair. I was the one of the few who was late to get the results. MG had called me when I was taking my bath. She told me that many hadn't been able to score and A for BM and BC. I was really worried because these 2 subjects are the one that's going to kill me. I reached my school and He Phoned Me. I HADN'T GET MY RESULTS. == Mum had order me to call her instantly no matter what the SLIP show. I walked to Miss Ng, she asked why I was late, I said I am scare of the results. She ask : " Really?" Really. " You don't have to worry la..." So, I scanned the SLIP myself and YEAY!! THE ROW OF A's I was a little shocked when an Indian man seating with his daugh...

I came back from KL yesterday. What a relieved.The 6 days at KL was quite interesting and quite euphoric actually. The first day was a little rush-y. We slept at 11 and woke up at 5 am. 5 people on one 2-person-bed.The competition on 17th was quite ok, but we lost anyway. A Little sad because we had tried so hard to win, but we will keep up the spirit. =) I couldn't remember much details over there, so I will just summarize : 1. IN total. I actually talked to him for one and a half hours. The first call was 1 hour. I didn't know that his voice could be heard, but I didn't care either. My team mates kept coming into the room and peek at me, Angkor Wad had said I had too much credit. Indeed, during that moment. XD AFter the 2nd call, they started questioning me, which made me landed in a load of questions on my way back to Kulim in the bus. I couldn't stand their faces looking at me in such a "scary" way that I decided to let them ask ONLY 5 questions. They ...

Once upon a time I believe it was a Tuesday when I caught your eye And we caught onto something I hold onto the night You looked me in the eye and told me you loved me Were you just kidding cause it seems to me This thing is breaking down, we almost never speak I don't feel welcome anymore Baby, what happened, please tell me Cause one second it was perfect Now you're half way out the door And I stare at the phone He still hasn't called And then you feel so low You can't feel nothing at all And you flashback to When he said forever and always Oh, and it rains in your bedroom Everything is wrong It rains when you're here And it rains when you're gone I was there when you said forever and always Was I out of line? Did I say something way too honest? Made you run and hide like a scared little boy I looked into your eyes Thought I knew for a minute now I'm not so sure So here's to everything coming down to nothing Here's to silence that cuts me to the cor...

There I was again tonight, forcing laughter, faking smiles Same old, tired place lonely place Walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy Vanished when I saw your face All I can say is it was enchanting to meet you Your eyes whispered, "Have we met?" across the room, your silhouette Starts to make its way to me The playful conversation starts, counter all your quick remarks Like passing notes in secrecy And it was enchanting to meet you All I can say is I was enchanted to meet you This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I'm wonder-struck, blushing all the way home I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you The lingering question kept me up, 2 a.m., who do you love? I wonder 'til I'm wide awake Now I'm pacing back and forth, wishing you were at my door I'd open up and you would say It was enchanting to meet you All I know is I was enchanted to meet you This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I...

IT'S TIME FOR ME TO LEARN THAT ONE SHOULDN'T BE ASKING ANY MORE IF THE OTHER DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. Today was at least better than the last 2 days, more interaction, there was one time where it was nice and just so comfortable that I hope I was still in that position. I wish I had never move an inch from it. It won't happen again. Few words could be use to remind me about today, STEP, KICK, HIT.

I am under stress. No matter how much i wanted to rebut that fact, I realise I can't.From the time I took my bath when I came home from HuiGuan, I wasn't in the mood to talk at all. The practice today just sucks, I wasn't in the right condition. I didn't do my part the way I should. I know maybe it;s just excuses, but i really feel like quitting, for this December. There's so much I wanted to do but I couldn't. I missed talking to my cousin who is a year older than me, but today's mood spoiled the whole thing. Yesterday night, I had been worried. I couldn't actually ask him what's wrong, though I know i shouldn't be asking any more since I won't get the answer either way. I couldn't chat, so I ended up calling my friend, which I had never call before and talked for almost half an hour. Thanks. I am sorry that I sent that lame message to you, it was a mistake, I didn't know I sent it to you. I didn't say hi to you because i ...

I was late for at least 15 minutes. They all shouted at me of course, never mind. ==. They wanted me to hold the key although they knew that I will be late. Practiced my scripts for at least 4 times today, I don't think it's consider ok. Urgh .17th is nearing. For today's lunch,we  ate noodles as Angkor Wat won the scissors-rock and Cloth game with JW. They all gave me their some sort of Fried lard. ==. I bought fried rice for WJ, Julius isn't behaving really well and I couldn't just see WJ eating chicken rice, Again. Thank God, NO HOT SCORCHING SUN. ^^~ Went Back and had 2 rounds of practice, and decided to buy cup-noodle for snack, Angkor Wad didn't want to buy, he kept eyeing mine and WJ's. WTH, and I just wasn't firm enough on not giving him my noodles. I couldn't have any peace while having it either,with his eyes and questions shooting at me, in the end he got the noodles and the soup as well.==. But I realised that I am not in the least influe...

My day was wasted in HuiGuan, as usual. I was upset-ted by Angkor Wat by his words of compliment.   WTH,COULD YOU PLEASE STOP SAYING IT. IF I hadn't type everything that I wanted to say to you in my phone, I don't think we would be having lunch together today. He had finished his exam, and now, if tomorrow is over, means it's a new record. :) Texted him. Somebody called him and he heard me screaming, obviously I was obsessed with Blasterball. Extracted from The Way I loved You : Breakin’ down and comin’ undone It’s a roller-coaster kinda rush And I never knew I could feel that much And that’s the way I love you

1.It's Going to end. 2 more days. HoHo.I wonder if anything is going to happen. Can't help thinking, after all, we need 3 more days to break it. :) 2. Erm, XXX, You can't say I am clever just because I guessed it right. It's because I know it's going to be a she.==. Ex's are definitely out of your list. I wasn't shock, I won't kill you yet. XD 3. Great. Don't Pat Me . That's going to be right on my mind if you are going to do it absent mindedly for the 3rd time if there is. I don't mind, just I don't want any misunderstandings. But I agree you are sometimes too funny that I couldn't hate you. Lol. Thanks for the Jokes.

It's the best when you finally Defined yourself.  Thanks to my friend ALOT, who actually SUMMARIZED up all my problems and made it into one big fat solution. I could finally find out and understand the truth inside me which i never will notice,which I had thought that it doesn't exist anymore. I slept well last night, but really late. I hope that he really is fine. PS : Thanks for defining me, you Saved the day. ;)

It's midnight .I needed to write. For 2 whole days, I am trying my best not to suck. I hate that winter feeling, it's suppose to be summer or spring. I don't feel like myself. I am worried. I really want him to just spit it out if there's anything. I can't live not knowing for the moment. I am freaking out. I really am out of "formulae" to solve "equations". I don't want to feel wintry.