.The Reverse

I got cane again because i didn't drink enough H2O. I did try to finish it, but i seldom remember i have a bottle of water. Why don't you just let me be gone for good.

I have decided to get back to Blogger now that I am sort of -want-to-write-in-a-blog-person-for the moment. Busy school life , but gossips always made it better, especially those fat and juicy ones. I did try my best not to poke in around too much, just in case I am unwanted. I don't wan to offend anybody. Wee. XD. Jot : I always imagine myself being a ballerina, but that's just, blurry. Haha.

I realise I am losing a grip on myself. Emotional, the same old girl like last year. I know there's really nothing to worry about. Yet, I am. I am worried about my temper. I am worried about my daily life. ( I hate volcano eruptions in 251) I wanted to be alone with somebody. I needed somebody that understands me. I longed for somebody to really talk to me about everything. I am thinking about everything way too much. Over reactive. Angkor Wat the trigger didn't even change my mood as well, though he always would have. I just felt like ignoring and snapping. I felt left out. Like I lost somebody that I was very sure that we were almost related. Like I do suddenly loss faith in somebody who believed in me, loss your trust that you have on me.I snapped at Magnesium most of the time, and regretted about it after a second. Words came out just like that, without filtration. I was suppose to sleep at 11pm everyday, well, I am still here. I don't have complete contro...

I don't know why, i kept arguing with my parents. Sometimes I really hate it. I admited whatever i could, all the wrongs and mistakes. I swear i did try my best to be a better member of the family, but all their comments were as if i was doing it unwillingly and just showing off. It;s what i get from them, and I don;t think i really have any reason to continue being the old Suzanne Yeoh of the house. I can no longer find any reason why i should try my best in this any more. They beat me up because of my crying face, but even if i were to say it was because of my braces that my mouth looked jutted out, what was the point? They would just treat it as an excuse. I am always giving excuse. Everything I did was mere acting. I did it without full commitment. Even trying to prepare a simple dinner of Maggi ended up with a fight, just because i used the wrong noodles. My explanation was ignored, unaccepted, and because it was unaccepted, I was being spanked and slapped. Yeah, It wasn...

It's been a long time that i neglected my blog, from 4 life isn't easy, not as fun as in lower secondary. I dreaded for school everyday, but i could still keep up with the rhythm, as least i am trying. My May results are far from satisfying. It's sad that i actually only get 1 A+ for the whole test, I should at least get an additional 3, if only i were to do better. The holiday's were not really "fertile" , i spent 1 week in KL as a recorder and 3 days at school as a secretary. I didn't do much, and facebook and tumblr was nagging at me.I should have ignore but that's hard to do so. Effortless.The only thing a i gained were beautiful bruises on my left leg, they had turn from big swollen stripes to blue black to maroon. Lovely colour. :) Crescent Shape 〈3 Angkor Wat changed alot, at least this has got nothing to do with Black Heart, as she has DL to settle with, but Fish was behind all this. LOL, great jokes made him surre...

Oh My. Time flies. It;s already April, and May is coming. E.X.A.M.= = I can't find time to update my blog. Form 4 is really busy.All the homework and practices at school. Everyone is busy for HAC. The princess is coming. Syafinaz. I think so. Black Heart started to talk to me randomly. I don;t know what's she up to.Anyway, She has got herself hooked up with LKL, and she herself has an intense interest in her whoever-that-boy-is. I got to know too many people like Sunny in our class. Well, they ended up in cool war.Wth. Miss Gooi told me that Angkor Wat wasn't in a good state. Well, maybe. HE told me he was glad that their debate circle friends from Kl agreed to lent them the "Wai-Ka". I really hope he doesn't get lazy because of that. He;s crazy. Owh, BTW, I couldn't help but get sanguine whenever i thought of HAC Day 1, It's the Day ! ;) and I love KuKumiao and Monkey Girl day by Day. HEHEHE XDXD

Finished Chatting. People say that time changes things. It seems real. For 4 years, and today it,s the first time Angkor Wat talked to me about him being stress. Well, i won't take his word still, he's a strong guy. Anyway, today's chat made me realise that those old debate days(not really, just 2 months ago) had really changed my perception that sometimes when you hate a person, it comes to the fact that he or she is  way better than you because they do not care much. Being in the same class with him for almost 3 months has thought me that i have to find a way to stand up against him in the rightful way. I  have to learn how to follow up.He didn't do anything wrong, it was just that he's easy going made me wanted to compete with him, at least, he's one of the best.  And there's always Black Heart, I don't know, but i could feel that she isn't very happy that i could now actually talk to Angkor Wat normally. I used to hate him in the past,...