.The Reverse

Today was quite drizzly... i saw something that i don;t want to.. accidentally...i saw it... honestly, i don't like it... it makes me feel kind off piss off... i hate the feeling when i have to pretend what i saw... with sumthing tat isn't real... trying to console myself... after one and a half months... it will be back to normal... but i am still not convince... because we can't always know what will happen... we only know what might happen... why don't you just keep yourself invisible... keep everything to yourself... don't try to take me into your world... i know i had fallen into your trap... why can;t u just let me go free...take ur shackels of my hand... let me get out of ur trap... if you can't...at least just tell me... why am i doing this for you... why am i having some feelings for you...and... why should i lie to myself for you... maybe...i wasn't strong enough to resist the temptation of having you... so...this time...i have another wish... i wi

it doesn't matter now... i mean..who cares... of course u might think that i am over self-counscious... u might think tat i m juz a toy... but no..i'm NOT..ok? i have my own path to follow... i realize tat i relly am sensitive... sometimes i would wish tat you nvr appear.. not exactly appear..you REAPPEARED..in my life... i still remember the date...its so cyrstal clear... u juz came and say hello...and of course... i FELL into your TRAP... sometimes i wanted to scold you... but i don't have the courage to face it... to face your reactions...to hurt you... it kinds of bother me tat you appear to be important to me... it's not tat i like you... its juz tat i can;t seem to leave you...alone... i mean having you as a friend has indeed become a habit in my life.. and my problem is i can't kick the habit... i would pay anything to be invisible for a second.. a minute.. maybe an hour if it is available... i juz wanted to convince myself that it doesn;t matter at all... ev

Raining heavily today.. feels kind of weird.. not the usual open feeling i felt.. sort of lonely...feeling so down.. there's no reason.. juz that i couldn't help it.. i only wish that..at this moment.. my phone will ring.. showing----1 message recieved.

虽然我们认识的方式有点古怪 然而 我还是很怀念 那古怪的感觉 慢慢的 你偷偷的 你悄悄的 开始在我生活里环绕着 当我感到孤独时 你知道吗 多半的原因 是你 呵呵 是你哦 哈哈 久而久之 我开始了 思念你的习惯 笔记本里 课本里 到处都是我铅笔的痕迹 可我却发现 一个人思念 竟是那么的寂寞 会问问自己 你会不会也在想我 虽然偶尔会尝试告诉自己 我不可以再想你 可是 我还是 忍不住了 我竟然愿意思念你 呵呵 既然知道自己会那么的怕痛 为何不再去想你 可是我逼不到自己 唉 我真失败 后来又觉得我不该逼自己 应该顺其自然 一切都会变得更美好 呵呵 好想你 。。。把思念打了出来。。。感觉真的很棒。。。

Eventhough it wasn;t what i wanted.. Eventhough i didn't end up as i had hoped.. The time's up.. and it's time to let you go.. It was juz a matter of time tat i realize.. I actually did WANT u.. but still...somehow and somewhere in my heart.. DOUBTS abt my wants are yet to be a mystery...