23.01.13
Today is Edward's birthday. I had forgotten all about it till when I wrote an announcement for choir. The date really reminded me about him. Yeah, I never forget. At first i thought of sending him a text, but i changed my mind in the end anyway, facebook is more appropriate at this level.
Today was idle. Like the reaped cane fields =D I had enjoy today. No hard feelings at all, plus the booster smile from Pacak, TWICE! XD Euphoric.
Just that there are still something not fitting in.
1. Why does IQ 200 seem to always guess correctly at everything. I lied at first, but then i decided that there wasn't anything bad. If people can tell it out from the first answer, it means you no longer have to lie.
2. I had been avoiding. I feel guilty. Yeah, I lied to Hazard. As usual of course. I don't really care if he knew. It wouldn't make a difference. He has other things to mind with and settle, which I am sure is already settled. If only he check it up or what. I mean properly.
3. You keep on telling me you're not mad. You keep on saying you don't mind. You do, don't you ? How many times have you purposely tried to cheer me up ? or take me away from those horrid things in my head ? Maybe I was wrong to have assume that way, but sorry, my mind doesn't function as yours does. We are different, which I accepted whole heatedly.
4. You know how I don't like you pretending. I don't mind you telling me, honestly, of what you want me to do. Even if you stumbled across this, I wouldn't say sorry for being harsh. I don't expect you to disappear and I don't want you to, of course. I will disappear from you, not directly, but I will train myself to.
5. I admit I appreciate you as my close friend. You are the first person who has ever ask me to accept that offer. Sometimes, it's because of all of these that I think I wasn't wrong about what I decided to do. What i decided to tell you. Of all the truth, I am the lie. My lie, your lie. Maybe not yours, but mine is marked on me.
6. I hate suspense. I have had the clear view of the whole thing, just that it wasn't certified yet. You just don't want to mess up things. Just get it certified ,please, so that I will understand that the case is close for now and ever.
7. But still, sorry for all the above, You know how I don't really show what I really want to say. If only you would understand.
8. Don't change your mind, I have got the point. Carry on.
PS : How I wish I don't have to spam about you here often. Sorry. I know it's bored if you saw. Awfully, sincerely, honestly sorry.
Today is Edward's birthday. I had forgotten all about it till when I wrote an announcement for choir. The date really reminded me about him. Yeah, I never forget. At first i thought of sending him a text, but i changed my mind in the end anyway, facebook is more appropriate at this level.
Today was idle. Like the reaped cane fields =D I had enjoy today. No hard feelings at all, plus the booster smile from Pacak, TWICE! XD Euphoric.
Just that there are still something not fitting in.
1. Why does IQ 200 seem to always guess correctly at everything. I lied at first, but then i decided that there wasn't anything bad. If people can tell it out from the first answer, it means you no longer have to lie.
2. I had been avoiding. I feel guilty. Yeah, I lied to Hazard. As usual of course. I don't really care if he knew. It wouldn't make a difference. He has other things to mind with and settle, which I am sure is already settled. If only he check it up or what. I mean properly.
3. You keep on telling me you're not mad. You keep on saying you don't mind. You do, don't you ? How many times have you purposely tried to cheer me up ? or take me away from those horrid things in my head ? Maybe I was wrong to have assume that way, but sorry, my mind doesn't function as yours does. We are different, which I accepted whole heatedly.
4. You know how I don't like you pretending. I don't mind you telling me, honestly, of what you want me to do. Even if you stumbled across this, I wouldn't say sorry for being harsh. I don't expect you to disappear and I don't want you to, of course. I will disappear from you, not directly, but I will train myself to.
5. I admit I appreciate you as my close friend. You are the first person who has ever ask me to accept that offer. Sometimes, it's because of all of these that I think I wasn't wrong about what I decided to do. What i decided to tell you. Of all the truth, I am the lie. My lie, your lie. Maybe not yours, but mine is marked on me.
6. I hate suspense. I have had the clear view of the whole thing, just that it wasn't certified yet. You just don't want to mess up things. Just get it certified ,please, so that I will understand that the case is close for now and ever.
7. But still, sorry for all the above, You know how I don't really show what I really want to say. If only you would understand.
8. Don't change your mind, I have got the point. Carry on.
PS : How I wish I don't have to spam about you here often. Sorry. I know it's bored if you saw. Awfully, sincerely, honestly sorry.
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