I woke up late, I do been dreaming about him again. I forgot what it is about. Mum had asked me if I had dreamt of falling off staircase or Taufu again.
Right, she's the cause of all this mess, partly. Breakfast, mum asked if I wanted so much to be in a relationship ==. I just kept quiet. After sweeping, I texted him, just to make sure he was back to his old self. Apparently he wasn't, and the messages, it's not him. Maybe he didn't get what I meant yesterday. Concentrated to Diluted. I had to use food analogy to explain. It sounds like joking, but I know he won't stand any nonsense from me. So, maybe my temper did flare up a little, but I was sure it wasn't as bad as him, I tried to control everything. The messages I type doesn't have to be like this if he wasn't in this mood.My fault. I admit. Can I say it hurts? It does then, but I can't do anything with it, I can't tell him, because if I do ,that won't be fair. It's not even up to pieces, and I am already bothered by it.
Suddenly the wall appeared, I don't know him again. It's like I do just fall for him for a month and then got stuck up at the riverbank or something when it had flow so smoothly all this time. I don't know if anything had change in him for the pass 12 hours or something. I can't control him, though It might hurt to know the truth, it's something I have to face. I somehow thought about what Bella had said in Twilight to her mum, it makes sense.
Crumpling papers makes me happy. Just write on it and tear it or Balled it up and leave it on my desk. After a few days I would read what I wrote. Crumpled papers make me feel I do realease evything out. Don;t want to let others know. I won't show my anger,try.I just really hope that it's going to be like nothing had happen. Leaving is one thing, Together is one thing, time is one thing, and ME, completely another thing. It's up to you.
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